First up – sorry for shortage of new fashion victims. The fashion victims of Shoreditch are still there but our fuzzy photography specialist ‘admin’ is in quarantine cos he’s on a swine flu ‘chain’. Yep, dead straight – its a big skive.

Release the victims

I spotted these two guys on the way to work this morning & am just loving their quirky retro power-dress combo.

If I’d spotted them anywhere else I’d assume its fancy dress, but this is a cold Tuesday morning in Shoreditch. They’re probably on the way to meet the bank manager to seek funding to open up yet another vintage shop, cos we really need one of those.

Bonus points for their little queefs pointing out from under their jauntily sat hats, their manbags and moustaches. Did I mention the short suits? We need to invent a scoring system, cos this shit would win.

Twats adopt emergency measures as recession hits the coolest bits of Shoreditch this week.

These two Shoreditch ladeez made sure they looked spiffing by wearing their Shoreditch twat staples, the unnecessary scarf, oversized bags and cheap plimsolls, while walking past RBS on Bishopsgate, despite the fact that recession cutbacks have forced them to eschew clothing. They must have had to spend their last pennies on crap 80s-revival electronica music or leg warmers.

Unfortunately for the banker behind them, he is too busy using his Wankberry – probably to text people how great he is because he still has his job – and misses two naked chicks walking past.